Our emotional van dramas unfold like an episode of Full House. I’m Stephanie, DJ, and Michelle all rolled in to one; Eric is Uncles Jesse + Joey and sometimes Danny.

Me: “I’m going to throw this pan out the window. I’ll watch the eggs splatter across the ground and I’ll go hungry. I’m so MAD!”
Him: “Dear, let me help you. Trade places with me.”
Me: *Cries into pillow*
Him: “What’s bothering you? Let’s talk about it.”

And by the end, we’ve both had a cry, bared our souls, hugged and had breakfast. All that’s missing are the dramatic crescendos and commercial breaks.

I’m sad to leave. This adventure surpassed all expectations and evolved into something much more meaningful along the way. We’re not dirty hippies in a van, playing hooky from work, indulging in pure idleness. We’re 2 individuals, ultimately working to discover and define our parts in the unified whole. And not only in our romantic relationship, but in our lives. The world. Our families and careers. In essentially every aspect you can think of while standing beneath a waterfall, under a starry sky, before a boundless ocean–anywhere that makes you feel like a tiny human with big dreams. THAT is the heart of what I’ll miss. Being reminded of the sheer grandeur of the world, it’s enduring strength and beauty, in contrast with our vulnerable beings. Knowing we are all ashes, all dust, made of the same stuff, spinning in the same direction. Understanding that we are but a speck of that dust, being blown about in the breeze.

But oh, how wonderful it is to be that speck! And oh, how delightful it is to unfurl your sail and direct which way that wind shall push you! What a beautiful thing it is to be a part of this mighty whole!

-K